Essential knowledge if you really want to get to grips with the Netherlands. Where would Prive, Weekend, Party, the Telegraaf and Story be without them? Here are eight WAGs, cougars and reality soap star staples.

Estelle Cruyff
Estelle Cruyff (niece of Johan), married until recently to former footballing great Ruud Gullit, is a designer, actress, model and presenter (or damp) but is much more famous for her allegedly Olympian capacity for shopping.

The whole PC Hooftstraat perks up when Estelle arrives. The 35 year-old had a short-lived romance with kick boxer Badr Hari who, like his girlfriend, is less famous for what he is than what he does, in his case beating up people, allegedly of course.

Yolanthe Cabau van Kasbergen
Glamorous Yolanthe Cabau van Kasbergen (1985) is also a damp and has an ‘intricate love’ for fashion, she confesses on her website. She is married to footballer Wesley Sneijder who plays for Turkish club Galatasaray.

Yolanthe was in a relationship with singer Jan Smit and stuck it out in his native village of Volendam for two whole years (and then deservedly absconded with more than her share of the kitchen utensils, allegedly of course. Source: his mum)

Sylvie van der Vaart
Sylvie van der Vaart (1978) is yet another damp. Her main claim to fame is her marriage to Hamburger SV player Rafael van der Vaart, a fairly tale story which recently came to a rocky end.

Multi-talented Sylvie will undoubtedly continue to have a lucrative career in Germany and she has already moved on from Rafael, allegedly of course.

Rachel Hazes
Rachel Hazes (1970) is a woman who knows what she wants. At fourteen she took one look at podgy singer André Hazes and decided he was the one for her. And so he was, eventually. Patient, plucky Rachel became famous after the documentary Zij gelooft in mij shed some light on the family’s private life, especially André’s erratic behaviour.

But they stayed together until the singer’s death in 2004 and Rachel is now preparing a film on his life.

Patricia Paay
Dutch diva Patricia Paay (1949) just goes on and on and on and on. This singer’s career took off in the sixties and has lasted until this day. Her ex is moderately famous Dutch-American DJ and entrepreneur Adam Curry who is 15 years her junior.

Who’s that lady with my man was one of her greatest hits and that may well be what she asked when Adam left her for younger model. A stalwart of television talent show judging panels, at sixty La Paay – as she is known – was the oldest woman to pose naked for Playboy.

Patty Brard
Patty Brard (1955) is another die-hard Dutch diva. She was a member of famous Dutch girl band Luv, whose hits include You’re the greatest lover. Her subsequent band, wittily called Enuv, was not a success.

Brard had a successful  presenting career and now keeps up a steady trickle of appearances on programmes like Dancing on Ice and Stars Jump In which she shows considerable courage, demonstrating a split in the former and a no less painful looking belly flop in the latter.

Natasja Froger
Natasja Froger (1965) is married to singer René Froger. Natas shot to fame, and a healthy nest egg of her own, when she started presenting a whole host of television programmes.

One of these, De Frogers: Effe geen cent te makke’, or De Frogers: no two cents to rub together featured the couple trying to make ends meet on €1,000 a month which fooled no one but helped establish Natasja as a cost-cutting queen. Ha ha.

Barbie
One celebrity which has been specially manufactured to fill the pages of the gossip press is Barbie (somewhere between 20 and 45), star of several reality shows. Blond perma-tanned Barbie and her pals were filmed during a booze-filled holiday in Crete, confirming every parent’s worst suspicions.

She has since settled down with partner Michael, who was detained by police on suspicion of trading in guns and drugs. They have become the proud parents of ‘love baby Angelina’. All in the presence of the cameras of course.